Tag Archives: opinion

Empathy

Empathy is defined as “the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.”

Were you able to understand how I felt when I opened my heart to you? Or were you too busy shredding me of every bit of dignity I had left?

You did care about me, but only until you weren’t allowed to. You did love me, until the whispers in your ear commanded you not to.

I could feel the pain in your eyes when you left me, but in the end you chose your reputation over me.

If I only I could see through those deep brown eyes of yours who you really are. On the surface, you are a laid-back gentleman with a big heart that everyone gets along with. Underneath that guise, however you are much more in terms with your inner demons than you are willing to accept.

When you commit yourself to someone, you also commit yourself to their mind, heart and soul. When I committed myself to you, I felt a connection to every part of you. Even when I discovered that dark side of you that you will not uncover to maintain that image that you have, I loved you. I could feel that, beneath that layer, there was goodness buried within.

For that reason, I tolerated that side of you that would belittle my feelings and scream and curse at me in public until you made me cry. People would ask why I stay and call you verbally abusive, and I would always defend you whether you were present or absent. I would have liked to imagine it was the same for me. No matter what, I always saw you through rose-colored glasses, and maybe that good self you showed me during the year and a half we were together was a part of the real you.

Regardless, it does not negate the fact that you did not feel the same empathy I had for you during and after our relationship. You had broken many promises the day you left, and you continued to do so afterward. Everything I confided you with that you swore you would take the grave is now out in the open in spite of the fact that I still keep all of your secrets to myself for your sake, you have made it painstakingly obvious that you do express the same concern for how I am doing while I often wonder about your well-being despite everything that has happened between us, and you decided to give me a final stab to the back by saying that I exaggerate my trauma and use it to get attention. You know what the fuck I went through and how it still has an effect on me, yet you still turned it into a joke on social media with your friends.

After all of that, I repressed the pain I felt from your betrayal and cruel words because I felt it was deserved, even if I had given you empathy that you did not reciprocate in the end.

I was not perfect, but I did everything I could to withhold many things I wanted to say to you and protected you from the cruel words of others for your benefit. When you are blessed with empathy toward one’s feelings, you are also cursed with remaining blind to their poor treatment toward you because of all the excuses you have made for them.

I held these feelings in for too long to refrain from hurting your feelings even if you did not spare me the same pain, but in doing so I have kept myself from understanding my own feelings. As I continue to grant you empathy, I deny myself any. So I will continue to write about you until my fingertips tire of doing so.

How do you live in the present when your mind is still in the past?

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Presenting a Situation for Something I am Working on, Please Give Your Honest Opinions.

Hello all. I know I have not posted since January, and I apologize for the delay in posts. I plan on getting back to stories, plays, and vents as often as possible now that many ideas are finally flowing through my head once again and now that I am finding inspiration again. Early 2017 was certainly a rough few months for me and depression was keeping me from being able to focus my mind on one set project. I am, however, back finally and planning on releasing a few things this summer. In fact, I have an announcement to make in an upcoming blog that is set to be published tomorrow or Thursday.

I know this is a weird first post to make considering I have been inactive for about six months now, but I am working on something that requires me to ask these questions and I want to get as many answers as possible. I posted this following message on my Facebook and Facebook page, and figured this blog would also be a good place to gather opinions as well:

I am currently in the process of working on something for something, and I currently am seeking some opinions on the situation presented in what I am working on. I usually never do this, but I really do kinda need as many opinions as possible. I will not be publishing out any names for said thing I am working on, nor will I be ridiculing anyone for their opinion. I would appreciate if likewise, no one would judge anyone else for their opinion either. I know that is near impossible for anyone to do so on the internet as anything that warrants an opinion on the internet and that can create controversy causes an uproar, but I am doing this solely for research purposes. What for you say? You’ll find out in the future. For now, please, I am asking for people to give their opinions on my following questions about the situation I am about to present. I will be recording these answers but will not attach any names to it, so answer as honestly as you want. I will not judge. If you prefer messaging me personally, then you can do so as well. Thank you all for reading and participating. Feel free to share my post as well on here. I will take as many responses as I can get. 🙂 If you are not interested in this, I will not force you to respond.
Trigger Warning for sexual assault. I don’t wanna make anyone uncomfortable so if anything involving sexual assault of any kind triggers you, do not read any further.
Keep in mind, the scenario is NOT based on me or anyone I know personally.
Situation:
A person in their mid-twenties is at a party with their friends. They are a bit drunk, but can still function for the most part. As they stumble around the party, they wind up getting suckered into being alone in a room with another stranger. The person winds up, against their will, raping them. The person being raped is visibly not consenting in any type of way, but the other person keeps going anyway. Once the person raping them is done, they leave behind their victim who is still processing what just happened and sobbing uncontrollably unsure of what to do because they are positive no one will believe them.
So now you wonder, okay, Lisa, where are you going with this? Well two questions now arise from this situation I presented. Like I said, answer them as honestly as possible. Please answer number 1 before even reading number 2.
1) So now whether or not you noticed, I did not disclose any genders in this scenario. So without giving second thought, as you read the scenario, what gender would you assume the victim is? Don’t give it a second thought, just answer honestly what gender you envisioned the victim as. Now tell me, without a second thought, what gender do you envision the rapist as? Again, no second thoughts right now, just tell me what gender you saw the rapist as. If possible, can you explain why you see the victim and rapists as these genders?
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2) Now that you have thought about number 1, I want you to take something into consideration. Generally, many would think the victim is a female and the rapist a male. If that is what you answered, it is okay. That is the case usually and like I said there is no right or wrong answers right now. Let’s say though, that the victim was a cisgender male and the rapist was a cisgender female? Say they were both in their early 20’s, the victim was not asexual, gay, or bisexual. He just was not into the girl who raped him, in fact he only ended up alone with her because he was trying to help her because she appeared piss drunk and he feared she would be taken advantage of in her state so he just wanted to be by her side, but he was not attracted to her at all just trying to do a good deed. Then, as it turns out, she was not wasted and it was a trap and she took advantage despite him not wanting to sleep with her? Without a second thought, what did you think as soon as the situation turned to be with a straight young male victim and a young female rapist? You can answer this in any way. You can also add whether or not it could be deemed as rape. Again this is all YOUR opinion and I am leaving my own thoughts on this matter out.
Thank you all for your time and responses again~